Marriage

October 7, 2012


Mark 10:2-12
2 Some Pharisees came and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?”
3 “What did Moses command you?” he replied.
4 They said, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away.”
5 “It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law,” Jesus replied. 6 “But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’ 7 ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, 8 and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one. 9 Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”
10 When they were in the house again, the disciples asked Jesus about this. 11 He answered, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. 12 And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.”

When you read the stories in the Book of Genesis, you are reading about yourself. YOU are Adam. YOU are Eve. YOU are Cain. YOU are Noah. Just like Adam and Eve, you have been tempted and you have sinned. Just like Cain your anger has been so great that you have hurt or have even wanted to kill your brother or someone. And like Cain, God has put his mark on you to protect you, the mark of the cross upon your forehead and upon your heart at your Baptism. And like Noah, you have been saved through the waters of Baptism and have been given the sign of the New Covenant of God’s salvation.

In Genesis chapter 2, Adam was created before Eve and he is alone. There are animals, but none of them is the proper helper and companion for Adam. Adam was lonely. God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” And from his rib, he created Eve. When Adam saw her, he was filled with joy at this most perfect creation of God. He said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.” And then there is this blessing, Gen. 2:24-5, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.” Then came temptation and sin and shame. And eventually, the perfect companionship of Man and Woman was broken and this time the ripping out of Adam’s rib is called divorce. The rib is next to the heart. In divorce, a person’s heart is ripped out. The two that had become one in marriage have now only become half and half, incomplete and lonely. Jesus says the reason for divorce is hardness of heart. It is a lack of love, it is selfishness and stubbornness and unwillingness to love. Divorce is not the plan of God the Creator. Jesus said, 6 “But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’ 7 ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, 8 and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one. 9 Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”

Moses did not approve of divorce, but because of stubbornness and sin, Moses made a law to regulate divorce, to protect the woman.

And Jesus further told is his disciples, 11 “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. 12 And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.” It seems that Jesus does not recognize a divorce and that remarriage is like polygamy. In Matthew’s Gospel, Jesus says the only reason for divorce is the unfaithfulness of the other spouse (Mt. 19:9).

My own personal opinion as a pastor is that divorce is better than two people living together and fighting and eventually killing each other. In other words, it is for safety. As a pastor, each case must be looked at with love and understanding and a lot of forgiveness and trust in God. As far as remarriage, my own personal opinion as a pastor, again with a lot of love and understanding and a lot of forgiveness and trust in God, is to know the love of God. God understands the needs and the loneliness of people. Humans need companionship. God looked at Adam and said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” We need to trust the mercy and forgiveness of God.

Oftentimes in the Bible, our relationship with God is like a marriage. In the incarnation of Christ, it is God becoming a human to save us in his birth, death and resurrection. In faith we say like Adam, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.” Christ has come to save creatures like me. Christ is our companion and makes us complete. This is the joy of the eternal wedding feast of heaven.

With some fear and trembling and trepidation, I feel that I should say something about a subject that is often talked about today. That is the topic of “gay marriage.” The Bible and the church throughout history, knows of no other marriage than that of one man and one woman. Marriage laws are made by the State. For example, that neither siblings nor cousins may marry. And there are age restrictions. If a state legislature wants to change the definition in the dictionary, they have the legal power to do so. That does not mean that the church has to recognize those unions nor does the church have to perform wedding ceremonies for them. I do not think that gay marriage is right, but as a pastor, my own personal thoughts on this matter, again with a lot of love and understanding and a lot of forgiveness and trust in God, is to know the love of God. God understands the needs and the loneliness of people. Companionship and friendship and love and trust and faithfulness and security are important in every human relationship no matter what kind it is: friends, buddies, teammates, classmates, co-workers, neighbors, siblings, spouses. We learn about that perfect companionship from Jesus Christ. God said, “It is not good for the man or woman to be alone.” Jesus was born. Jesus is “Emmanuel, God with us.”

Amen.

Michael Nearhood, Pastor
Okinawa Lutheran Church


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